


Cheeky Gift Drabbles

by WolfyWordWeaver



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Animagus, Comfort, Crossdressing, Drabble Collection, Explicit Sexual Content, Flirting, Fluff, Friendship, Getting Together, Gift Fic, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Intimacy, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Overprotective, Polyamory, Public Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:01:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 6,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23507296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfyWordWeaver/pseuds/WolfyWordWeaver
Summary: To celebrate a milestone of 69 followers on Tumblr I gifted out several drabbles. The prompts are as follows:1. "Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet?"  "...Maybe." (rated T)2. Remus or Sirius wearing something surprising under their robes (rated T)3. Comfort fluff when the first war is coming to a head (rated T)4. Them being intimate in a non-sexual way and Remus getting cuddles (rated T)5. Cheeky, spicy, and angsty (rated M)6. Something fun maybe end of fourth (or fifth) year by the black lake (rated T)7. Either Sirius or James is sticking it to Remus while the other watches (rated E)8. "It's blood, not nuclear waste. Chill out." (rated T)All of these are WolfStar except #7 which is WolfStarBucks.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin/James Potter
Comments: 4
Kudos: 121





	1. Chapter 1

**for** [ **@dyingbetweenthepages** ](https://dyingbetweenthepages.tumblr.com/) **prompt: "Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet?" "...Maybe." rating: T**

Bouncing on his feet in annoyance, Remus glanced at his wristwatch once more before glancing nervously at the gathering crowd around the visitor's desk. 

"For Merlin's sake," he muttered under his breath before marching towards the men's loo to find Sirius. 

Why would his boyfriend spend so long in the toilets when he knew that they were signed up for the next tour of the British Parliament? Various choice words were muttered under his breath as he marched towards the gilded door and as soon as he stepped into the neatly maintained he was assaulted with an even more colorful array of words being muttered less than quietly before a few rounds of odd thudding could be heard in one of the stalls. 

"Uh, Sirius?"

The cursing and thudding instantly quieted.

"Remus?"

"What the fuck is going on?" he responded as he approached the stalls, surprised to see that there weren't any visible feet under the doors. "Which one are you in?"

"This one," Sirius chuckled nervously as he waved above the door.

Remus came to a pause in front of the stall and wondered what in the world Sirius was doing. "Care to explain? We have, like, five minutes until the tour starts."

There was a pause before another nervous chuckle. "Mind coming in, love?" The lock was unlatched with a shake of the door.

Remus crossed his arms over his chest. "We don't have time for a quick fuck in the bathroom, Sirius! And this is a Muggle government building! Have some fucking decorum!"

"Love, come in."

"No."

"Please?"

"Fuck no."

He heard Sirius sigh and then the sound of splashing and thumping and a few more choice words. 

"Remus, please come in here. It's not for a fuck. If you want to get to that tour then please come in."

Staring hard at the shiny white stall door, realization began to dawn on the young werewolf. "Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet?"

"...Maybe."

Try as he might, Remus couldn't keep in the incredulous laughter as he pushed open the door and stepped into the tiny stall where his boyfriend was indeed perched on the toilet with one foot stuck in the bowl. 

"Love, what in the bloody hell are you doing?"

Sirius grinned helplessly and shrugged. "I just thought that I would be able to nip off to give James a quick visit before we got on the tour."

Grabbing Sirius around the waist and tugging, Remus just shook his head in amusement. "Sirius, those portals are only in the public toilets out on Whitehall. Not every Muggle toilet leads to the Ministry of Magic."

"I know that _now_ , Remus!" he grumbled.

"How did you get it stuck so far down?" he laughed again with another tug. There was some banging on the stall wall as he tugged uselessly at his boyfriend.

"Couldn't help myself, love," Sirius laughed as he wriggled against Remus. "I don't do anything half-cocked."

"Umph, you're so heavy too."

"Harder!" 

"I swear, I'm going to kill you for this, Sirius."

Finally resorting to magic, Sirius' foot was released with a squelch and a copious splash of water to the tiled floor. Sirius grinned down at Remus and pressed a quick peck to his nose. "Thanks for getting me out, love."

"It's been more than five minutes," Remus stated flatly. 

Sirius didn't have the decency to look embarrassed or remorseful. Instead, he threw a flirty wink and pinned Remus against one of the walls.

"Well, since we'll have to wait a bit for the next tour anyway..."

What else could one say with a proposition like that?

"Oh, all right. Better make it worth the wait, Black."

"I always do," was the snarky response.


	2. Chapter 2

**for**[ **@narrowredoubt**](https://narrowredoubt.tumblr.com/) **p** **rompt: R or S wearing something surprising under their robes rating: T**

Remus knew that Sirius came from old-blooded wizarding kind and five years of rooming with the boy taught him that Sirius had a lot of habits and ideas that Remus thought were strange considering that the Muggle lifestyle was a major part of his upbringing. While Lyall was a pureblood, he had allowed his non-magical wife's culture to pervade in the privacy of their home. So it wasn't uncommon for the four boys to unintentionally find out cultural differences during conversations or daily living with each other.

Occasionally, Remus would be gifted with a conversation about how intolerable James and Sirius found the idea of Muggle trousers.

"I like a nice breeze around my bits" was the usual response to these discussions or "if I want to lock my balls up, I'd get married." He and Peter would have great fun at their expense in a rare moment of solidarity and exclusiveness. Peter always enjoyed having something over the other boys.

Sirius' foray into Muggle fashion started as a laugh when he stole Remus' jeans and jumper and strutted about the room in a flamboyant manner eschewing how very _manly_ he was. It had left all the boys in stitches although Remus had hidden his blushing cheeks and racing heart behind the humor. Then, as his relationship with his family deteriorated, Sirius began to dabble more and more into Muggle fashion albeit only in the comfort of their shared bedroom. 

But on this particular Friday evening, Remus was far from expecting the issue of cultural attire to be brought up.

"Ugh, it's still so fucking hot," Sirius grumbled as he puttered about the room. There was still another hour or so before the students had to be in bed and he had been chomping at the bit all evening while James was stuck in detention and Peter was caught up in Herbology extra credit.

"That's because it's practically summer," Remus muttered in response as he lazily fanned himself with the folded remnants of a potions essay. 

That didn't seem to please the young aristocrat. "These robes are so heavy! Why has wizarding kind bothered with this shit for so long?!"

Remus laughed outright. "I thought robes were 'so much better' than Muggle clothing, Sirius?! Missing a breeze?" He turned the fan towards his friend and made a pathetic attempt to blow some cooling air at him. 

Sirius rolled his eyes. "It's these blasted school robes that are the problem. Useless at keeping cool."

"Then take them off," Remus huffed as he turned the fan back towards himself. He was in sensible slacks and a t-shirt although he was considering losing the slacks and remaining in his underwear. 

"I will," Sirius shot back haughtily as he tugged at the buttons near his throat. 

Remus tried not to stare as the other boy worked his arms out of the billowing sleeves and began to slide the black cloth over his head, but he knew that there weren't many opportunities to admire the lithe body without being noticed and he always tried to take advantage when he could. Peeking in the showers was where he drew a hard line. However, the usual sight of muscled legs gave way to something so unexpected and shocking that Remus made a loud strangled noise and felt the heat explode across his cheeks.

Sirius quickly slipped the rest of the robe over and off his head before looking over his shoulder in surprise. "What?"

Remus tried to salvage the situation but could only manage to gawk and open and close his mouth uselessly. Another embarrassing noise squeaked past his vocal cords.

"You don't think it looks good?" Sirius asked calmly although there was a hint of mischief in those pale eyes. "And I've been meaning to have words with you about failing to inform me of this perfectly acceptable article of Muggle clothing."

"I-it's...I..."

Sirius smoothed his hands down the A-line jean skirt and cocked his hips. "Honestly, Remus. The air flow is pretty great in this Muggle half-robe, and it works well with any of those t-shirts that I've been buying."

" _Sirius_ ," he gasped in incredulity. The hem of the skirt came to an end a couple of inches above the boy's bony knees and hinted at the shapely thighs it barely covered. 

A smirk curled on those lips as Sirius fingered at the embroidered paisley decorating one of the pockets, his other hand subconsciously smoothing over the Muggle band t-shirt he was wearing too. "You know, I think that I'll go down and see if I can meet James on his way back here from detention."

Remus wasn't sure that he was still in control of his body, and he found himself tackling the other boy to the floor and shaking his head vehemently. "N-no!" 

One of his legs slid between Sirius' knees and he whimpered as he felt the warmth bleeding through his trouser and into his leg. 

Looking very much like a cat that got the canary, Sirius looked up into the disheveled boy's face. "No? Do you have a better idea of what we could do?"

The werewolf thought that maybe a demonstration of another culturally inappropriate behavior was in order.


	3. Chapter 3

**for** [ **@fuckyeahkacie** ](https://fuckyeahkacie.tumblr.com/) **prompt: comfort fluff when the first war is coming to a head rating: T**

War was waiting right outside of the door and Sirius knew that he didn't have the luxury to ignore it any longer. The dark shadows were whispering things of death and destruction, voices sounding suspiciously like Bella and Walburga. They were coming to get him and he wouldn't be able to hide this time. He wouldn't be able to run away. This time, he would have to face them head-on. 

Sirius would have to be willing to bathe in blood of his enemires, to let loose a part of him that he had tried to bury so deep inside that he could pretend that it wasn't there anymore. The Blacks had a history of inflicting horror for a reason and it was something that Sirius had been so scared of following along with. He had glimpsed the murderous intent resting easily in his psyche back in Fifth Year and had recoiled in horror at how little the mortal danger of a fellow student had affected him. Sirius had been far more affected by the look of disappointment on Remus' face the next morning. 

It was at that moment that he swore to bury that part of himself away to never see the light of day again. It was the part of him that had made assaulting other students and picking on others so easy. It had made looking down on Snape sensible and fun. It made mocking the less talented witches and wizards harmless. But if there was any chance at staying alive when faced off with Voldemort and his followers he had to call on that part of himself and nurture it back to life. He had to make each interaction with others a matter of life and death for him and Remus. They could be killed at any moment outside of these heavily warded walls. He needed to be just as willing to kill the Death Eaters. 

"Sirius?" a soft voice called from behind him. Bed sheets rustled and a warm face nuzzled into his naked hip. "What's wrong?"

The moon was going to be full in a few short days and he knew that Remus needed to get as much sleep as possible.

"Sorry, babe. It's nothing, go back to sleep." Grey eyes watched the shifting shadows in the corner and tried not to shudder in fear of the future.

A warm arm wrapped around his waist. "It's okay. You can tell me."

With a shuddering breath he wriggled down to his boyfriend's level and tangled his legs with the other. "Just thinking about our first Order meeting coming up. Things are already getting a lot worse since graduation and we haven't even been to a meeting yet."

Remus blinked blearily at him and trailed still-warm fingers over Sirius' pale collarbone and shoulder. "Hm. 'S probably gonna get worse."

"Yeah, I know. Just trying to get my head in the right space."

There was a crooked little smile offered up in response. "Your head's never been in the right space, Sirius. Why start now?"

"Wanker," Sirius chuckled, feeling some of the tension melt from his shoulders.

"Mmm, you've never complained 'bout that before."

"Yeah, all that wanking has given you pretty good hands."

"Only the best for you," Remus yawned. His hand never stopped its steady journey trailing across the prickling skin. 

The shadows were shrinking back.

"I'm going to keep you safe, Remus," he muttered, the softness of his pillow partially blocking one eye and giving him a skewed view of his boyfriend. "I want you to know that. I'll do whatever it takes."

Amber was bleeding into the usual vibrant green of those eyes. "I know, Sirius. We'll keep each other safe; all of us will." 

Vile whispers faded.

Pale fingers reached out and tangled into the tawny hair, tugging softly at the waves. 

"Whatever it takes, Remus."


	4. Chapter 4

**for** [ **@casualmaraudering** ](https://casualmaraudering.tumblr.com/) **prompt: them being intimate in a non-sexual way and Remus getting cuddles rated: T**

"How're you feeling?"

Remus cracked open an eye and took in the sight of his sweet boyfriend. 

"Pretty awful," he admitted before closing his eyes, already tired from the effort. "Sometimes I wish that I could at least get used to this monthly shit."

Sirius shuffled around the room and Remus could only assume that the boy was shrugging. Warm hands began rubbing at his sore feet and Remus couldn't help the pleased groan that slipped past his lips. 

"Is it okay if I rub up your legs?" Sirius asked quietly, fingers still working on those deep tissue knots in his arch.

"Yeah," he murmured. 

A kiss was placed on both bony knees as those strong fingers continued kneading the soft flesh. The combination of the warmth from those hands and the steady way they continued to massage away the tension made relaxation a distinct possibility. Remus wondered if maybe he wasn't grateful enough for having a man in his life who was eager and willing to do things like this for him. Grateful that those wandering hands never crossed the line with him, just continued in their given task of bring him relief. 

Sirius patted a bare thigh before squeezing onto the couch with Remus, his own bare legs tucked neatly behind Remus'. His athletic arms wrapped around Remus like a perfectly fitted puzzle piece and he grinned into the back of the sweat-slicked neck. There wasn't a lot that he could do to help Remus when his monthly issues came up, but Sirius knew that snuggling was as close to a cure-all as he could come up with. Being in the sanctuary of their home, they were even able to do the snuggling in their bed clothes. 

"You're my favorite person in the whole world," he mumbled below Remus' ear. "Did you know that?"

"Hmm, I guessed that around the time you started rubbing my feet."

"Yeah, I don't go around just touching anyone's feet," Sirius chuckled. 

In fact, Remus knew that Sirius had quite an aversion to feet in general so it was pretty obvious to him the degree of love Sirius had for him.

"My feet are special," Remus grinned as he snuggled back a little more solidly into Sirius' body. 

"Yes they are. They've got to match the rest of you, after all."

"You are just full of self-esteem building words today, aren't you?"

This too was something that Remus knew he shouldn't ever take for granted. Sirius was always extra generous in his words of affirmation after the monthly ordeal. Not even his parents had ever been as generous in their compliments for him.

"Only for you, Remus. I couldn't be arsed otherwise." Another chuckle and a squeeze from those arms and both boys were content with all in the world. 


	5. Chapter 5

**for** [ **@neromarcove** ](https://neromarcove.tumblr.com/) **prompt: cheeky, spicy, and angsty rated: M (for non-explicit smut)**

"Love is a strange force," Remus choked out as he tried not to shriek in terror. He couldn't hide the tremble in his knees as well as he could control his vocal cords, though.

"Yeah, so is dumbassery," Sirius chirped in response as he double-checked that the broom Remus was precariously standing on was solidly frozen in place with his spells. The wind was blowing a bit harder than he would have preferred if he had been given more time to plan things out. "Looking good there, Remus."

Long thin fingers clenched the cool metal ring he was leaning on in a death grip. "Is this good enough? Any further forward and I might just flip off this damn thing."

Sirius slowly flew around Remus and gave the "iffy" hand gesture. "I think that you need to actually be leaning inside the goal for this to work."

A few choice words were muttered by the chestnut-haired boy before he took a deep breath and stuck his body through the Quidditch goal and resting his stomach against the freezing cold metal hoop. "Why did any adult think that sticking a bunch of reckless and impulsive children in the same house to goad each other on to grander and grander feats of idiocy was a good idea?"

"Maybe we should ask McGonnagal," Sirius teased as he came around behind Remus and adjusted the broom's position a bit higher so that he could feel a bit more stable. "Rumor has it that she's the one who actually placed this spell."

" _Merlin_ , I do not want to think about Minnie being the one behind this shit."

Sirius circled around in front of him and gave a sultry wink. "I think she'd be rather proud of us for actually being the first one to accomplish this."

"That or we're going to be in the infirmary for the rest of the term because she booby-trapped the damn thing to prevent shit like this happening. She was the captain of the team for a while, right?"

The disowned Heir shrugged. "I dunno. But even if we do get hexed within an inch of our lives, it'll be so worth it."

"You do realize that we're only doing this because you want to rub it in James' face, right? I have no desire for the bragging rights or anything."

"Aw, are you telling me that you're not going to get anything out of this?" Sirius teased with that infuriating glint in his eye.

"What I get out of this is solely for internally motivating factors. And a good shag. If we live, that is."

"Eh, we'll live. I'm pretty sure."

Remus bit his lip as he chanced a quick glance down. "Uh, yeah. Just make sure you've got a good grip on me because I'm taking you down with me if that's how we're going to meet our end."

A barking laugh was swept away by the sharp winds as Sirius pulled his broom up to a stop behind Remus and stood up as casually as a person standing on solid ground. Remus refused to get annoyed at the other boy's unfairly gifted genetics and tried not to squirm too much as his robes were lifted and bunched up at his lower back. His fingers just dug into the cold steel of the hoop and eyes stared straight ahead in the distance, the slight wobbling of his frame giving him the illusion of being mid-flight. Cold fingers dug into his hips tightly and he felt familiar flesh press up against him.

"Good idea to go bare-bottomed under the robes," Sirius praised. "Less for me to have to maneuver."

"I have a decent sense of self-preservation, thank you very much," he quipped before once more taking stock of his precariously perched position. "A...barely there sense of self-preservation."

"You're so full of it," the voice rumbled against his back.

"I will be if you'd hurry the hell up," Remus snapped back in embarrassment and a bit of fear. 

"Fucking Morgana," Sirius laughed again, that barking noise strangely soothing. 

Cold fingers dipped into the slick heat of Remus' body to check that the preparations they had done back on solid ground were still sufficient before Remus was rewarded with a breath-stealing thrust. His whole body moved forward making him teeter a bit further than he was comfortable with before Sirius' hands settled him more solidly on the enchanted broomstick. 

"Fuuuuuck!" he moaned as he kept his watering eyes focused on the view of the Forbidden Forest stretch out in the distance.

The body behind him kept up the brutal pace.

"That's it, Moony," Sirius growled, "I want them to be able to hear you all the way to the tower!"

His calloused hands tilted the angle of Remus' pelvis and the young werewolf nearly howled in delight. He was flying high, living a life that would have been completely different if Sirius hadn't been in it. Who else would find out about such strange Hogwarts lore? Who else would egg James Potter on to test the veracity of said lore? And who but Sirius Black would actually follow through on such a reckless dare?

Completion ripped through Remus with the strength of a rampaging hippogryph and he had a few blissful seconds to contemplate the utter poetry of orgasm and the optical illusion of flying before the sudden explosion of magical charms and spells nearly made him jump straight off the broom. Sirius was laughing breathlessly from his own orgasm while red and gold sparks exploded around them and the large gold letters formed over their heads.

GRYFFINDOR SCORES!

If Remus hadn't had his hands practically frozen around the metal hoop he was sure that he and Sirius would have fallen to their untimely deaths laughing all the way down.

Dabbing at his mouth to hide a rue smile at the intruding memory, Remus looked up from his breakfast to see Professor McGonnegal glancing over at him. "Yes, Professor?"

"Are you certain that you don't want to come see the game, Mr. Lupin?" Her sharp eyes glanced towards Harry chatting excitedly with his friends before turning back to the greying instructor. "It's sure to be an excellent game."

"I think it'll be best for me to stay inside," he replied with a sad smile. Too many memories. 

She nodded curtly and took a delicate sip of her tea.

"Professor?"

"Yes, Mr. Lupin? And please, you may call me Minerva."

Not bloody likely.

"Did, uh, did any of the professors ever question why you gave Gryffindor those 200 points? Near the end of our Seventh Year, that is."

She looked down her spectacles at her former student and a smile peeked out from the usual stern expression. "Mr. Lupin I believe that you will find most professors quite aware of most of the Hogwarts Legends and Lore, especially the more lurid ones. No one needed to have anything explained to them."

He took another sip of tea to keep the wistful look off his face, treacherous memory replaying the amused and proud look she had shot their way the morning after or the way that James nearly cried in exasperation when Lily let him know in no uncertain terms that she would not risk life and limb so that he could join his friends in the Quidditch Scoring Club. Or the way that Sirius bit his lip teasingly and waggled his eyebrows promising far more fun and adventure in their future.

"Ah, I see."

The Head of Gryffindor House waited until he was talking another sip of tea before adding, "Besides, I was only going to award 100 points but Albus reminded me that the enchantments required at least two people's participation and that both students should be rewarded."

Few students noticed their Professor Lupin spitting out his tea in surprise before choking back a laugh.

Bitterness nestled in Remus' chest even as he chuckled quietly. Hopefully the bastard on the run would be caught soon and shipped back to that hell hole he deserved to rot in for eternity. The only freedom he deserved was the flittering memories of days gone by.


	6. Chapter 6

**for** [ **@chaosisthemethod2themadness** ](https://chaosisthemethod2themadness.tumblr.com/) **prompt: something fun maybe end of fourth (or fifth) year by the black lake (pre-prank) rating: T**

"Mmmph, dis isso gooood," Sirius moaned before lewdly slurping at the treat in front of his face.

James and Peter were laughing hysterically at Remus' scarlet face and the fact that his own ice pop had been promptly and unceremoniously crushed the moment those noises started.

"M-mate, you're going to give Remus a case of the nargles if you keep that up," the bespectacled boy laughed.

Sirius glanced over at his recently official boyfriend and grinned widely with the sticky substance smeared obscenely across his lips and cheeks and down his hand. Remus didn't think that a messier eater could exist and right now he wondered how much longer he could survive with Sirius being like _that_.

"This will cool him off!" Peter teased as he promptly kicked the young Black Heir off the short dock sitting on the edge of Black Lake.

Raucous laughter rang through the heavy summer air, interspersed with the affronted gasps and sputters as Sirius flailed in the water.

"Remus!" he whined as he struggled to tread water in his robes. "Aren't you supposed to defend my honor or something? Shove him in here too!"

"Sorry," Remus laughed in response as he allowed what remained of his own destroyed sweet to drop into the murky water. "Really, the way that you were carrying on left very little honor for me to defend."

"Ooooh," James taunted at the wet wizard before he was rewarded with a cold hand jerking him into the water as well. "My glasses!" he cried in dismay as he flailed around too.

"Pull your legs up for safety!" Remus warned Peter before Sirius was able to grasp the thick boy's legs. 

Amidst the laughter and sputtering, Peter and Remus began to do a taunting dance on the dock while Sirius and James leveled juvenile insults in hopes to infuriate the half-bloods into joining them. When the insults didn't work, Sirius attempted to seduce his boyfriend with fluttered eyelashes and kissy lips. His only reward was Remus laughing hard enough to cry.

When both boys finally gave up and resorted to pouting, Remus grinned wickedly and decided that turn about was fair play. "Hey, Sirius!"

"What?" the other boy grumped.

"Don't worry, I'll jump in too."

Grey eyes lit up in victory before almost immediately widening in shock with a rosy blush splashing across his pale cheeks. Peter was absolutely howling in laughter as he watched Remus shimmy out of his school robes dramatically, even slipping off his Muggle trousers and t-shirt. James cheered and wolf-whistled as Remus strutted down the wooden planks of the dock and tugged suggestively at the elastic band of his briefs. Sirius swallowed a mouthful of the water and began choking and coughing which only made Remus laugh harder before he jumped (fell really) into the water to "save" his boyfriend.

Grinning as swept Sirius up in his arms and felt their kicking legs bump against each other, Remus wondered if life was always going to be like this. Summer break was going to be starting soon and he'd have to be separated from Sirius for a couple of months. Would Sirius forget him during those few weeks? What if he found another bloke that he liked better? Or even a girl? Who would be the first one to start growing facial hair? And would that even happen this year? Would Sirius keep gaining inches upwards and finally overtake Remus? Would James come back to school as dark as roasted coffee beans from endless hours playing outside? Would Remus come back with even more scars? Would Peter finally bring back news of successfully going on a date with his Muggle neighbor?

A spray of water spit from Sirius' mouth shook him out of his spiraling thoughts and he grinned back up at the boy in embarrassment.

"Don't worry," Sirius stated easily even as he struggled to keep his head above the surface of the water.

"About what?"

"Anything," he replied happily.

Spitting water back at Sirius, Remus supposed that he could take his boyfriend's advice.


	7. Chapter 7

**for** [ **@remus-john-lupin** ](https://remus-john-lupin.tumblr.com/) **prompt: either Sirius or James is sticking it to Remus while the other watches rated: E (explicit)**

Being an only child from an old-blooded rich family had been a lonely existence for James Potter through the first ten years of his life. Fleamont and Euphemia always did their best to give their child everything he needed or desired, but it didn't have the same effect that playing vigorously in the garden with peers would have had. 

Things completely changed when he finally got to attend Hogwarts and it was there that James learned that he was more than just the apple of his parents' eye. Other children _liked_ him and they liked to follow his orders. He came up with the best pranks and ideas and most of them resulted in boisterous laughter and applause from his peers. With Sirius, Remus, and Peter at his side things only got better. Their combined wit, guts, and recklessness quickly became the thing of legend and even the upper classmen took note of these "Marauders."

Even the professors fell for their collective charm - Remus with his wide eyes and oh-so-innocent "exasperation" with his friends' foolishness, Sirius with his unfairly good looks and silver tongue, Peter with his unassuming ability to blend in and catch all kinds of information from students and professors alike, and James with his ability to wrangle them all and dream big. They were a perfect team, completing each other in every way.

That's probably why James took it so hard when he learned that Sirius and Remus had properly discovered puberty before he and Peter had and that they had discovered it together. Without him. He had stumbled into the bathroom in the middle of the night to find their wet bodies slotted together with their hands and lips doing things he hadn't been bothered to think up until that very moment. It had taken him a few weeks to come to a decision on how best to handle this new development in his life and in a manner truly befitting the leader of their close-knit band he decided that it was best that they all learn more together. 

It didn't take Peter long to realize that he had zero interest in things of a sexual nature when it came to blokes. He took to focusing on Wizard's Chess Club instead. 

For James, it became apparent that he was interested in the idea and imagery of sex just as much as the act itself. It was in a similar vein to how much he adored the delightful Lily Evans. She was pretty and sparkly, good to look at and appreciate; he could imagine the two of them getting married and having lots of babies together with a life full of fun and adventure. When he watched the way that Sirius would run his fingers down Remus' neck, James could imagine all the wonderful things those fingers had done and could do. When he watched Remus lick and suck down the milky white skin of the young Pureblood, James could see just how best that tongue could be used to make Sirius scream until he was raw. 

But where Lily was a pleasant idea that was almost worth more in theory than in practical reality, the relationship that he had with Sirius and Remus was something more akin to a fine wine. The longer he sat back and watched, the sweeter the taste would roll around on his tongue when he took a gulp. 

Tonight was something special.

It was their last night in the castle, probably well into morning by now. There had been a lot of drinks in the common room complete with cheers and tears, but now was the time for a final private celebration. In less than six months Sirius would be turning 19 years old and they'd be celebrating a first birthday outside of Hogwarts. He had already completed the necessary paperwork for inheriting his Uncle's property and had even hired a professional Cottage Witch to decorate the space and imbue it with good energy, so the Marauders were already planning on all the use they would get out of that townhouse during the year. But that was all in the future and the present was all they had right now.

And right now James was leaning against the cool stone wall of their dormitory room, lazily palming over the front of his boxers. The heat of summer would have annoyed him more if it hadn't been for the dampness of the stones resting directly against the skin of his back, but he had to admit that the sheen of sweat looked good on his boys. Pale moonlight streamed through the large windows and across the debauched scene of Remus almost folded in half with Sirius pressing those long scarred legs up to his ears while Sirius' mouth was stretched obscenely wide to accommodate the hefty werewolf cock. Silver eyes glanced up to catch James' chocolate eyes and they shared a moment. 

James absolutely loved seeing that mouth stuffed with cock and from the glint in Sirius' eye he knew it too. 

Too soon the white-skinned Pureblood pulled off the stiff flesh with a lewd pop and spat the excess of thick saliva against the exposed hole before pulling one hand away from Remus' leg and using his long fingers to tease and stretch open the gasping teen. Hazel eyes opened blearily and looked up to catch an approving glance from the dark-skinned Head Boy. James rose an eyebrow and tutted softly. Remus squeezed his eyes shut once more and his mouth fell open as he gave himself over more completely to the experienced ministrations of his partner. 

Perfectly white teeth dug into the plump lower lip as James continued to observe the writhing bodies on the crimson sheets before him. His hand was pressing more heavily against his own excited flesh, finally even dipping below the waistband of his underwear to tease along the wiry pubic hair. Sirius knew how to handle Remus, knew just how far to push him without breaking. He knew just how much prep to spend time on and he knew when to just stick it to the werewolf. Contrary to the almost sickly appearance the young man often had, Remus was _not_ fragile and he loved to take a good pounding. Lips usually twisted in thought as he studied were now gaping wide as he moaned and panted desperately. Those hazel eyes flashed open again and were rewarded with a grin and nod. 

Pleased to have gotten a positive response, Remus leaned back into his new position with Sirius pressed up against his back and their legs slotted together as they remained kneeling towards the edge of the bed. Those eyes screwed shut as he continued to receive shallow and exuberant thrusts from the young man behind him while he gripped his visibly throbbing cock with a scarred hand and pumped desperately. The whine Remus gave was downright sinful and James finally uttered a soft moan. Grey eyes snapped up again and that unbelievably cocky grin curled on those lips making James want to step forward and give that brat what was coming to him. 

Instead, James licked his lips slowly and tilted his head, one hand coming up absentmindedly to push his glasses back up on the bridge of his sweaty nose. He continued to watch as Sirius pressed his lips against Remus' ear and began whispering what must have been absolute filth because the werewolf was instantly bucking and crying out in his glorious relief - back arched tightly and abdominal muscles quivering. 

The atmosphere in the room changed instantly and James grinned mischievously. The first part of the game had just given way to the second and this time he wouldn't be sitting back. 


	8. Chapter 8

**for** [ **@boosh-randoms** ](https://boosh-randoms.tumblr.com/) **prompt: "It's blood, not nuclear waste. Chill out." rating: T**

"C'mon, Peter. It's blood, not nuclear waste. Chill out."

The young sandy-blond man was practically vibrating in fear. "I-it's not the blood I'm worried about, you prat!" He reached out towards the bloody handkerchief as if to help stifle the blood flowing from Remus' nose but pulled back.

Remus gave him an annoyed side-eye as he tilted his head back. "It's not the first time I've ever bled."

"Yeah," Peter whined as they drew nearer to the townhouse where he was sure that his life was going to come to an end. "Maybe we should go to James' place first..."

Remus came to an abrupt stop and glared at his friend as best as he could over the bundle of cloth pressed against his still healing nose. "Peter. We're in the middle of a fucking war and if the worst thing that happens to me is that my face collides with the back of your head while we're scurrying about in the dark then I'm perfectly content with that. What the bloody hell are you worrying about?!"

"Moony?" came a sleepy voice as the familiar door opened just a few meters from them. "Are you-" 

Peter squeaked in fear.

Sirius growled.

Before Remus could say anything there was a flurry of fur and teeth and scraping nails as Wormtail the rat darted down the street only to be chased by an apparently pissed off Padfoot. The obnoxious and wild barking was sure to wake up the entire neighborhood so Remus decided to just fuck it and ran after the two Animagi.

"GET BACK HERE YOU MANGY MUTT AND LEAVE HIM THE FUCK ALONE!!!!!!"

Ah yes, Remus was in the habit of forgetting how ridiculous his boyfriend could be when it came to his welfare. 

"BARK BARK BARK!!!"

He could only hope that Sirius would have better recall about not being so illogically protective if Remus finally made use of that no-sex threat.

"I SWEAR, NO MORE SEX FOR YOU IF YOU KEEP THIS UP!!!!!!"

"BARK BARK BARK!!!!!"

Maybe not.

It wasn't until nearly twenty minutes later as Remus dragged a not-really-contrite Padfoot back to the townhouse by the scruff of his neck that Remus realized that his desperate attempt to spare Peter a gruesome death had a rather unintended consequence.

"I hate you," he growled down at Sirius as the elderly lady next door slammed her window shut.

The long pink tongue lolled out happily as the black furred creature grinned up at him.


End file.
